What's everybody's plans for a Cheltenham Festival behind closed doors?

[RufusFlynn]

Have been down the last few years or so as the Mrs has family that live not far from Cheltenham; although none of the group are that into racing, they enjoy a few bets and it is normally a good social few days.

Have got the four days off work, so will make the most of being able to watch the full build up and coverage and check in on FJ throughout the week as normally try not to spend too much time on my phone whilst with her family. Her uncle is one of those 'know it alls' who likes to think he knows everything about racing, despite knowing very little, and moaned all last year about the over inflated prices of everything on course - so I'll actually enjoy a year off from that!

The Mrs is also off on the Friday (although will probably still be working from home anyway for the rest of the week) so will organise getting some food and cocktails delivered to at least try and make a bit of a day of it.

[robith]

Have been down the last few years or so as the Mrs has family that live not far from Cheltenham; although none of the group are that into racing, they enjoy a few bets and it is normally a good social few days.

Have got the four days off work, so will make the most of being able to watch the full build up and coverage and check in on FJ throughout the week as normally try not to spend too much time on my phone whilst with her family. Her uncle is one of those 'know it alls' who likes to think he knows everything about racing, despite knowing very little, and moaned all last year about the over inflated prices of everything on course - so I'll actually enjoy a year off from that!

The Mrs is also off on the Friday (although will probably still be working from home anyway for the rest of the week) so will organise getting some food and cocktails delivered to at least try and make a bit of a day of it.

I went to a uni that generates a lot of bankers, and every year my mates send me these PDFs that go round them of some know it all guy who's written up all the races in huge depths and doesn't tip a single winner the whole week

[Outlaw]

I went to a uni that generates a lot of bankers, and every year my mates send me these PDFs that go round them of some know it all guy who's written up all the races in huge depths and doesn't tip a single winner the whole week

Layers dream, earning from both sides of the crust Robith.

[Mr X]

Find the schedule of being at the fez just to much these days and stick to the two days of the October showcase meeting for going to Cheltenham. The fez at home these past few years seems to have a ritual similar to lockdown with my village pubs not into racing.

Everything is prepared the previous week, with all my anti post bets listed for each race each day. booze, food etc. also prepared in advance. Door or phone not answered during the afternoon of race days. My only racing mad friend lives on a Greek Island so we discuss with tech the racing near on every day throughout the year and the fez is no different.

The mornings are spent putting a decent placepot perm together. I have a lunch spread and open a bottle of decent red at 1.00 p.m. every day to watch the racing then settle down early evening to watch the replay's with a few drams of a good single malt. This is my four days of bliss. The Friday night is usually in the pub to conclude a fantastic week of racing. The weekend and the week beyond is one of recovery and refection.

Any profits from the week are always spent on a racing trip from a couple of days at York in the summer or if very lucky a three week trip to the breeders cup and tour of Memphis and the deep south with the proceeds of decent placepot a couple of years ago.

Not long to wait now and I wish all of you an enjoyable and profitable week.

[nortonscoin200]

My Cheltenham Festival plan.

1. Blag my way through the garden gate at about 11.15am each day using one of last year's badges - put on that I'm-a-bit-gaga-and-too-old-to-be-a-fraudster look. Works every time.

2. Head straight to the Arkle Bar (garden shed) where several bottles of Guinness have been left in plant pots. Face-time a racing pal who is also supping Guinness in his garden shed and talk form.

3. Pop over to the Tommy Atkins bar (kitchen) where you conveniently left a ready-made meal (maybe an Indian curry or Moussaka) cooking in the microwave.

4. Return to the Arkle Bar (shed) to consume the food and down one more Guinness.

5. Head over to the pre-parade ring (patio?/lawn?drive?garage?) to look at the runners in the first race. For added authenticity get a piece of rope and lay it on the ground in an oval shape. Cut pictures of race horses out of the paper (you have almost 7 weeks to prepare, no excuses). Put each picture on the ground, weighed down by a stone in case it's windy.

6. Then back to the Arkle bar for one more Guinness.

7. Return to the pre-parade ring (patio etc) which has now morphed into the parade ring. Examine horses and round up any strays.

8. Time to find a good spot to watch the racing from. I always like watching from the lawn in front of the grandstand so I'll go and stand in the middle of the lawn with a pair of binoculars - having moved the TV into position facing the window or an open door so the race is visible from this vantage point with the aid of binoculars (don't get too close, that's cheating, bins must be used).

Anyone who prefers to watch from the Grandstand can get a bucket and turn it upside-down to stand on. Use a garden bench (if available) if you have company.

9. Watch race and rush over to the winners enclosure (patio) to cheer home the winner if you've backed it.

10. Assuming you've got the winner walk over to the Golden Miller Champagne Bar (greenhouse) where a bottle of bubbly is waiting on ice in a watering can. If you've backed a loser it's back to the Arkle bar.

11. Repeat this schedule six more times - and then again for the next 3 days.

12. The Cheltenham Festival on a shoestring, what's not to like.

13. Just to be on the safe side, plan a nearby hiding place where you can dodge the men in white coats just in case they turn up at some stage. Highly unlikely but you never know.

[ryanh97]

Excellent nortonscoin200

[Spectre]

My Cheltenham Festival plan.

1. Blag my way through the garden gate at about 11.15am each day using one of last year's badges - put on that I'm-a-bit-gaga-and-too-old-to-be-a-fraudster look. Works every time.

2. Head straight to the Arkle Bar (garden shed) where several bottles of Guinness have been left in plant pots. Face-time a racing pal who is also supping Guinness in his garden shed and talk form.

3. Pop over to the Tommy Atkins bar (kitchen) where you conveniently left a ready-made meal (maybe an Indian curry or Moussaka) cooking in the microwave.

4. Return to the Arkle Bar (shed) to consume the food and down one more Guinness.

5. Head over to the pre-parade ring (patio?/lawn?drive?garage?) to look at the runners in the first race. For added authenticity get a piece of rope and lay it on the ground in an oval shape. Cut pictures of race horses out of the paper (you have almost 7 weeks to prepare, no excuses). Put each picture on the ground, weighed down by a stone in case it's windy.

6. Then back to the Arkle bar for one more Guinness.

7. Return to the pre-parade ring (patio etc) which has now morphed into the parade ring. Examine horses and round up any strays.

8. Time to find a good spot to watch the racing from. I always like watching from the lawn in front of the grandstand so I'll go and stand in the middle of the lawn with a pair of binoculars - having moved the TV into position facing the window or an open door so the race is visible from this vantage point with the aid of binoculars (don't get too close, that's cheating, bins must be used).

Anyone who prefers to watch from the Grandstand can get a bucket and turn it upside-down to stand on. Use a garden bench (if available) if you have company.

9. Watch race and rush over to the winners enclosure (patio) to cheer home the winner if you've backed it.

10. Assuming you've got the winner walk over to the Golden Miller Champagne Bar (greenhouse) where a bottle of bubbly is waiting on ice in a watering can. If you've backed a loser it's back to the Arkle bar.

11. Repeat this schedule six more times - and then again for the next 3 days.

12. The Cheltenham Festival on a shoestring, what's not to like.

13. Just to be on the safe side, plan a nearby hiding place where you can dodge the men in white coats just in case they turn up at some stage. Highly unlikely but you never know.

Excellent NC.

[charlie]

My Cheltenham Festival plan.

1. Blag my way through the garden gate at about 11.15am each day using one of last year's badges - put on that I'm-a-bit-gaga-and-too-old-to-be-a-fraudster look. Works every time.

2. Head straight to the Arkle Bar (garden shed) where several bottles of Guinness have been left in plant pots. Face-time a racing pal who is also supping Guinness in his garden shed and talk form.

3. Pop over to the Tommy Atkins bar (kitchen) where you conveniently left a ready-made meal (maybe an Indian curry or Moussaka) cooking in the microwave.

4. Return to the Arkle Bar (shed) to consume the food and down one more Guinness.

5. Head over to the pre-parade ring (patio?/lawn?drive?garage?) to look at the runners in the first race. For added authenticity get a piece of rope and lay it on the ground in an oval shape. Cut pictures of race horses out of the paper (you have almost 7 weeks to prepare, no excuses). Put each picture on the ground, weighed down by a stone in case it's windy.

6. Then back to the Arkle bar for one more Guinness.

7. Return to the pre-parade ring (patio etc) which has now morphed into the parade ring. Examine horses and round up any strays.

8. Time to find a good spot to watch the racing from. I always like watching from the lawn in front of the grandstand so I'll go and stand in the middle of the lawn with a pair of binoculars - having moved the TV into position facing the window or an open door so the race is visible from this vantage point with the aid of binoculars (don't get too close, that's cheating, bins must be used).

Anyone who prefers to watch from the Grandstand can get a bucket and turn it upside-down to stand on. Use a garden bench (if available) if you have company.

9. Watch race and rush over to the winners enclosure (patio) to cheer home the winner if you've backed it.

10. Assuming you've got the winner walk over to the Golden Miller Champagne Bar (greenhouse) where a bottle of bubbly is waiting on ice in a watering can. If you've backed a loser it's back to the Arkle bar.

11. Repeat this schedule six more times - and then again for the next 3 days.

12. The Cheltenham Festival on a shoestring, what's not to like.

13. Just to be on the safe side, plan a nearby hiding place where you can dodge the men in white coats just in case they turn up at some stage. Highly unlikely but you never know.

I love this, what a great addition to the thread! You are one of my fav posters

[The King Pimm]

My Cheltenham Festival plan.

1. Blag my way through the garden gate at about 11.15am each day using one of last year's badges - put on that I'm-a-bit-gaga-and-too-old-to-be-a-fraudster look. Works every time.

2. Head straight to the Arkle Bar (garden shed) where several bottles of Guinness have been left in plant pots. Face-time a racing pal who is also supping Guinness in his garden shed and talk form.

3. Pop over to the Tommy Atkins bar (kitchen) where you conveniently left a ready-made meal (maybe an Indian curry or Moussaka) cooking in the microwave.

4. Return to the Arkle Bar (shed) to consume the food and down one more Guinness.

5. Head over to the pre-parade ring (patio?/lawn?drive?garage?) to look at the runners in the first race. For added authenticity get a piece of rope and lay it on the ground in an oval shape. Cut pictures of race horses out of the paper (you have almost 7 weeks to prepare, no excuses). Put each picture on the ground, weighed down by a stone in case it's windy.

6. Then back to the Arkle bar for one more Guinness.

7. Return to the pre-parade ring (patio etc) which has now morphed into the parade ring. Examine horses and round up any strays.

8. Time to find a good spot to watch the racing from. I always like watching from the lawn in front of the grandstand so I'll go and stand in the middle of the lawn with a pair of binoculars - having moved the TV into position facing the window or an open door so the race is visible from this vantage point with the aid of binoculars (don't get too close, that's cheating, bins must be used).

Anyone who prefers to watch from the Grandstand can get a bucket and turn it upside-down to stand on. Use a garden bench (if available) if you have company.

9. Watch race and rush over to the winners enclosure (patio) to cheer home the winner if you've backed it.

10. Assuming you've got the winner walk over to the Golden Miller Champagne Bar (greenhouse) where a bottle of bubbly is waiting on ice in a watering can. If you've backed a loser it's back to the Arkle bar.

11. Repeat this schedule six more times - and then again for the next 3 days.

12. The Cheltenham Festival on a shoestring, what's not to like.

13. Just to be on the safe side, plan a nearby hiding place where you can dodge the men in white coats just in case they turn up at some stage. Highly unlikely but you never know.

[barizan]

A few people here still planning on meeting with friends if the pubs are closed. Surely we're all expecting that if the pubs are closed, household mixing is still going to be restricted. Do people just plan on ignoring that?

Yes. We’ve given up a year of our lives, enough is enough, come at me

[ryanh97]

Yes. We’ve given up a year of our lives, enough is enough, come at me

Without meaning to derail the thread... I've not got many issues with that, but the same people saying they'd do that for Cheltenham, are the same people who have ridiculed my generation on here due to a few rule breakers and said that anyone who breaks the rules shouldn't get treatment if needed. Rank hypocrisy if you ask me

[barizan]

Without meaning to derail the thread... I've not got many issues with that, but the same people saying they'd do that for Cheltenham, are the same people who have ridiculed my generation on here due to a few rule breakers and said that anyone who breaks the rules shouldn't get treatment if needed. Rank hypocrisy if you ask me

This country is full of it mate. Self righteous wankers everywhere who tell people how to live their life. And if anyone says what about the NHS. I have my parents who have 60 plus years of service for the NHS and have worked their bollocks off in this pandemic, whilst I worked for the NHS for 15 years. I’m well aware of the risk and reality of life. Time to start living.

[charlie]

This thread has been brilliant so far and this will take it down a completely different path.

Can anyone who wants to continue covid chat do so on the Cheltenham behind closed doors thread please

[Ray]

Ill bring it back up, I AM BUZZIN FOR IT

[Faugheen_Machine]

This thread has been brilliant so far and this will take it down a completely different path.

Can anyone who wants to continue covid chat do so on the Cheltenham behind closed doors thread please

Well said Charlie